Thursday, April 14, 2011

An Interview With Barbie

  My first altered Barbie post called "Barbie The Undead and more..." in Sept 28, 2010 [link]is my second most all time popular page with 421 page views. It is kind of a blog rip off to take photos from varied places and become popular...but it was all in the Dumpster...and I picked them out with great joy!
As I crawled in the Virtual Dumpster I call the Internet....

I found Barbie again!

The thing is about that given time...there is more to learn about her!

Like she was launched in 1959, so that makes her a 51 yr old American icon. I visited her recent site...[link]
to see how she is doing lately in an exclusive interview:

Bluezy: "Barbie you are looking really happy and comfortable"!

Barbie:" Well, Bluezy, I AM looking fab at 51! Yet still the moms keep giving me to the young kids and they end up stripping me naked and losing the clothes. It has been a very cold time! However, moving to Malibu I got a cool car and this couch is great to lounge on".
Bluezy: "So how is Ken doing"?
Barbie: "Well, Ken is a long story.We were happy for a while...:"
Barbie (cont.): "He always had problems being accused of being a girl's toy. And there was that one time when a boy did have him as a toy and Ken had his first homo experience, he wasn't right with me after that. He had this big identity crisis".
(cont.) "Then an awesome opportunity came around"

"Steve Perry went solo and Journey was looking for a replacement"!

"Kenbo looked so good with long hair and he could sing, but he lost to some dude named Arnel that was discovered on YouTube! You know it is just like it is today, hell Arnel is not even American or Native American like Steve Perry -Ken has 1/4 Lakota"!

"Then Kenbo really lost it"!

Bluezy: "Omg that is terrible, but did he dance like Michael Jackson, too"?

Barbie: (broke out in tears) "Oh, I just didn't know what to do. I started gaining a lot of weight finding comfort in food and watching youtube videos and comment section jumping letting my frustrations out on Libertarians and sometimes Republicans. I finally got out of the house when my dear friend Jim asked me to join him at a convention."


 "Jim was such a handsome gentleman. He told me what I needed was a Jeannie intervention! He happened to know the Jeannie Doll and hooked us up".

Barbie: "Jeannie told me that sometimes plastic immortals really just want to be immortal humans. So she blinked my Kenbo into a human and he seems real happy now".

Bluezy: "Oh...I wondered how this kid just came around out of nowhere...I see the resemblance, too"!

(MEDIA RATIONALE: all sources can be found with keywords: fat barbie, altered ken, homo ken, justin bieber. No infringement or disrespect. see disclaimer on sidebar)



afterthegoldrush said...

Fuckin' AWESOME!

The thing is is I had a plastic doll back around the time my sister started collecting Barbies. It was not a Ken doll, though. It was shorter and had a different haircut. His wardrobe consisted of a football uniform and painted on underwear. It's crazy the shit you remember.

Bluezy said...

It is an instinct learned as young as can be that if it is yours you remember it especially when someone like your sibling or friend has it.

So nice to see you stranger!

afterthegoldrush said...

Are you using that last word as an adjective or noun?

Tim Chaney said...

Full figure Barbie got some big Hooters! : )

Bluezy said...

That she does, but still no

Carbie Girl said...

lol Thanks for leavin this on my comments, it's too funny! My barbies never had a ken doll - my mother feared we would play with them inappropriately at too young an age. As an adult it now makes me wonder some things about my mother back then !!

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